Online auctions (and the websites they are on) are bullshit.

Since a picture is worth a thousand words, I figured this could easily be my longest post yet, because I made a thing in Photoshop…


… that also has words in it.

Yes indeed, dear readers. Those are actual auctions, and yes that dickhead totally thinks a fucking number plate is worth a house deposit (as long as you don’t live in Auckland because homeless people in Auckland probably have cardboard boxes worth more than that). If this thing sells, I am going to have egg on my face, because that would make that guy a god-damn genius who just turned a $700 (already overpriced) piece of metal with letters on it into $20,000. I added that link so you guys can laugh at me when it inevitably happens.

Since we are already discussing online auction sites, I can now change the subject to the website that crappy auction was found on: TradeMe. It’s like Ebay, except if these websites were diseases, Ebay would be a slightly stuffy nose compared to the infected, puss spewing genital wart TradeMe is. I hate that website. Mainly because the people on it can be described like this:

Sellers: Wants to sell a probably ruined and shitty second hand item for 5 times more than you can buy a new one for. Or, you know, $20,000 for a fucking number plate.
Buyers: Wants to pay you $5, or trade you second hand chewing gum stuck to half a shoe for your expensive and highly desirable item listed for a very reasonable price, so instead of buying the damn thing, they “follow” you like a bunch of fucking lemmings. If only the internet had a cliff…

I had a whole other paragraph to write about how terrible their search algorithm is, but while screenshot hunting for this article, I found that they may have fixed it. So kudos I guess. Now just stop screwing us over with your shitty feedback system:


That guy is not alone either, it happened to me once. Well, a similar thing anyway. I needed a fridge, so I bought one off a seller. I made contact immediately to arrange payment and pick up. Long story short, 2 weeks and 5 emails later I was left with warm food, an empty email inbox and a mild temper (mild for me anyway). I placed bad feedback and proceeded to buy a different fridge. Not even 10 minutes afterwards, I receive two emails: One from the lady selling the other fridge losing her shit because I placed bad feedback, the other a notification from TradeMe that feedback has been placed. Bad feedback.

Yes, my perfect score ruined because of a shitty seller not making or returning contact, and I get to have a permanent shitty red emoticon because TradeMe refuses to remove it. Thank god for Facebook buy/swap/sell groups!

Online auctions (and the websites they are on) are bullshit.

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